Wlliam Gilmore Simms
Joscelyn: A Tale of the Revolution >> Chapter XIV: Brother and Sister >> Page 142

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Page 142

Novel (Romance) | The Reprint Company | 1975, 1976
Transcription 142JOSCELYN
"Has he ever allowed us any, my dear sister? Does he not still rule
us as mere children, to whom he can say now, as he did when we were
so: `Go there and come hither'? It is this conflict in my heart, between
my sympathies and my father's authority, to say nothing of my own
conflicts of opinion, that crushes the very life of manhood out of me
that caused me to discredit my manhood on that miserable day-
And, with his whole form writhing under the bitter memory, while
the big, hot, scalding tear drops dilated in his eyes, he turned away
from her, and paced rapidly the chamber.
She followed him she put her arms around his neck, and while
her own eyes filled with tears, like his own, she said :
"Alas ! my poor brother! You are not yet strong enough for
thought. Your strength will come back to you in season. But, go
from hence for a while. Here, you have too many associations calcu-
lated to embitter thought and to enfeeble will. Go down, and visit
Angelica, and forget these miserable politics, and lose the memory
of your defeat, as you call it, which Martin, by the way, says you
most strangely exaggerate. He says you spoke as well as any man
could, whose heart was not in his speech."
"Aye, he was right! My heart was not in my speech, Annie; but
the worst is, I know not where my heart is, or whether I could do
justice to either argument. My father stands between me and all
thinking; and even though he be right, in his opinions, yet I feel that
I should never heartily adopt the same conclusion, so long as the
denial is made of my own right to work out the problem freely for
myself. Do you see do you comprehend, Annie?"
"I do �I do, my brother! But go and visit Angelica. Spend a
week or two on Beach Island. She will show you where your heart
is, I fancy, and will so nourish it, on wholesome food, that you will
come back with a better will, working finally to a right conclusion. I
do wish that you could think fully with Martin. I am sure that his
heart is in the right place, for his head goes fully with it."
"You and your Martin! That swallow ! And your perfect faith in
the wisdom of his twitter!"
"Do not laugh at Martin, Walter. He is a good friend of yours."