Wlliam Gilmore Simms
Stories and Tales >> Mesmerides in a Stage-Coach; Or, Passes en Passant >> Page 229

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Page 229

Short Stories | U of South Carolina P | 1974
myself, thanks to your instructions, I'm a glorious Mesmerizer. I
put every body to sleep—my wife when she scolds me, my tailor
when he duns me, the parson when he makes me sleepy, and even
Vomit when he blackguards you. I challenged him to the trial, and
as he had ridiculed the matter before hundreds, he could not get off.
I had him sound in fifteen minutes, and made him swallow a half-
dozen of his own pills, from the effects of which Heaven help him
the poor devil has not recovered yet. He'll never trouble you
So much for Alford, whom I left the wonder of the village.
When we reached Gilbert's, I persuaded the driver to let me out,
and the first persons I encountered were Dalton and one of the
young damsels walking in the shrubbery. He blushed when he saw
me, and so did the young lady. I had little time to spare, but in the
few moments which I staid, I saw enough to satisfy me how the
land lay; and this morning I received through the mail a copy of
the " Telegraph," with Alford's endorsement, and brackets
around a small but significant paragraph, which runs thus
"Married, on Thursday evening last, by the Rev. Mr. Humdrum,
Willis Dalton, Esq., to Miss Lucilla Gilbert, youngest daughter of
the late Hon. John Gilbert, all of this county."
So much for Mesmerism in a stage-coach.